She wondered if he was already tired of her, if he would rudely push her away as one would a prostitute. 205 < 26 > SEBASTIAN TAKES A LOVER Sebastian had brought the first one home around 1503. She wanted to think of him as her beloved person, to be near him and watch him, to have him going about, doing this and that, saying this and that, unconscious of her, while she too remained unconscious of herself. Don’t leave me in this beastly thing. Only now it does not matter at all because Joan has come and has seen me.
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